Post by rorschalk on Mar 7, 2023 20:18:00 GMT
TQR SHARK TANK: The TQR submission process does not start with the reading of you capital. It actually starts with the introduction query/introduction accompanying the attached venture. The style of said may be but the style, perhaps irreverent and fetching or intensity that's too fraught to ignore. What will trip my trigger is indefinable as telling you it Touches the Monkey. It 's just that certain joie de vive or the venture capitalist with a easy way about them and a unique vision that will get them read here.
It may be as brief as a few sentences or even just a word that will strike me, the doorman at the club's entrance, to unhook the velvet rope from the stanchion and reverently bade you come in and take part in our secret basement slam poetry space where madmen howl and philosophers chain smoke their way through muttered profundities about making merry while the new mown grass is in the field and pontificate on our duty to make the best of all our fleeting sunless dances in the sun.
Some hints on what the doorman likes:
1. Know the lingo (see TQR main menu).
2. Read up on the original founding documents of this place (circa 2004) and incorporate that knowledge into your intro.
3. Brevity is the soul of wit, but don't be afraid to beef up your pitch.
4. Treat it like a pitch, or a brief Ted Talk or even a comedy routine. If you think you can bully me into submission to accept your submission, that's not entirely out of the question either. My deal is how clever of a bully are you?
4. I can honestly say that I've never taken a bribe to let anybody inside, but then again nobody's ever offered...I'll let sleeping dogs lie on that one.
Once you're capital is in, you'll get a confirmation gmail letting you know that you've made it inside. First stop: the floor. If not rejected on the floor, it is then sent to the Terminal for a 2nd round of vetting. If it is not rejected in the Terminal, it goes to the desk of CEO and autocratic leader Ted Rorschalk the final boss of TQR adjudication. You, the VC, will be apprised of your progress every step of the way, as all venture capital subs are openly discussed on site, from floor, to terminal, to executive suite and in those rare instance of concordance among the live wires sorting through the cap, a stunning and gorgeous capital gain. Just because a venture was accepted on the Floor or in the Terminal does not mean it is going to be featured in this publication. Only when CEO and autocratic leader (aka the monkey) is touched by what a VC is trying to convey will money change bank acounts and bread will be broken. Capiche?
It may be as brief as a few sentences or even just a word that will strike me, the doorman at the club's entrance, to unhook the velvet rope from the stanchion and reverently bade you come in and take part in our secret basement slam poetry space where madmen howl and philosophers chain smoke their way through muttered profundities about making merry while the new mown grass is in the field and pontificate on our duty to make the best of all our fleeting sunless dances in the sun.
Some hints on what the doorman likes:
1. Know the lingo (see TQR main menu).
2. Read up on the original founding documents of this place (circa 2004) and incorporate that knowledge into your intro.
3. Brevity is the soul of wit, but don't be afraid to beef up your pitch.
4. Treat it like a pitch, or a brief Ted Talk or even a comedy routine. If you think you can bully me into submission to accept your submission, that's not entirely out of the question either. My deal is how clever of a bully are you?
4. I can honestly say that I've never taken a bribe to let anybody inside, but then again nobody's ever offered...I'll let sleeping dogs lie on that one.
Once you're capital is in, you'll get a confirmation gmail letting you know that you've made it inside. First stop: the floor. If not rejected on the floor, it is then sent to the Terminal for a 2nd round of vetting. If it is not rejected in the Terminal, it goes to the desk of CEO and autocratic leader Ted Rorschalk the final boss of TQR adjudication. You, the VC, will be apprised of your progress every step of the way, as all venture capital subs are openly discussed on site, from floor, to terminal, to executive suite and in those rare instance of concordance among the live wires sorting through the cap, a stunning and gorgeous capital gain. Just because a venture was accepted on the Floor or in the Terminal does not mean it is going to be featured in this publication. Only when CEO and autocratic leader (aka the monkey) is touched by what a VC is trying to convey will money change bank acounts and bread will be broken. Capiche?
